And I even refuse to play with pointy sticks...

James Keating is one of the premier modern authorities on knife and counter-knife tactics. [Blackhawk]

What the heck does it mean to be a modern authority on knife/counter-knife tactics. I mean have we developed new knifing (maybe kniving is the correct term. I am neither a knifer {or a knifist} nor a grammariam {or a grammarist}) technology that we need a modern expert. I'm no counter-knifing (or counter-kniving) expert, but I think a gun is a pretty effective counter tactic in a knive fight.

PBS + Wine = Introspection

I'm just going to say the last hour of the six hour Country Boys documentary and a bottle of wine, makes for some introspection. I will also state that I watched "Win a Date with Todd Hamilton" after a bottle of wine and thought it was the best movie ever even though I did not remember the plot. So, maybe the wine had something to do with the introspection.

50 dead in Hajj stampede

How come is seems like there is always a murderous stampede during the Hajj. I realize that 2 million people in religious fervor are hard to handel, but they have have had 1378 years to perfect crowd control. I have heard those thick ropes used in theaters help a ton in making orderly lines.

Love at First Sight Makes Me Nauseous as Well

I just read an article about how this newly engaged couple met. It has a few good quotes like,

"Honestly, the whole love-at-first-sight crap kind of drives me crazy, but I guess when it happens, it happens. There’s no way to get around it. Whether the cliché makes you nauseous or not, that’s the way it works.”

and

Soon, the two were engaged in a deep discussion about Fascist art, a passion of hers... Mr. Gordon told the Love Beat, “it’s nice to meet someone who isn’t talking about Impressionists or Monet. It showed such character.”

O.K. so fascist art = character, whatever. But the best, most reallistic part was that each critical point in the relationship i.e., meeting, saying I love you, gettting engaged, occurred while they were completely plastered. Liquor, the lubricant of their love.

The Neighborhood Only Goes Downhill From Here

Now I'm not a prude, but I still do not want to run into this guy giving head in the parking lot of my local Barns & Noble.

good looking lean straight acting bi curious guy looking to give and receive oral and jerkoff. 5'10" 145 lbs brown/blue 6 inches cut. car action or motel- Rt. 18 area we could meet at Dick's or B&N- 420 cool be young, cute, clean, mostly str8, and discreet. peace [craigslist]

Seriously, just find someone with a place of their own. Besides, what does "peace" have to do with this.

Piecing Together a Night on the Town

I received an email this morning after a wild night out.

Opie,

So, Justin calls me today and tells me he talked on the phone to me on Friday which I completely didn't know, so I am going to need a run down of the things you remember. Cause apparently I blanked out a lot of it. Damn it.

Mick

In need of blurring the line between reality and fantasy I respond,

Mick,

It mostly consisted of you feeling up Courtney, not feeling up Shannon, kissing Ryan, and not puking. We did talk to Justin, but I did not understand what he was saying because it was loud and there had been much drinking.

Opie

P.S. After you passed out an my place, everyone came over and we all had a massive orgy. When we say stay awake and drink some water we mean it. By the way, please ignore any unusual bruises you may find this week.

Now 50% of that is true, so it is time to let his imagination figure out what happened.

Why Do I Not Have Cable

Catholic schools girls, art school graduates, and cowgirls with names like Sister Mary Jane, Venus Envy, and Punky Bruiser battling it out on roller skates. Rollergirls sounds like reality T.V. perfected. Alas, I will have to by the season 1 DVDs to enjoy it. Maybe TWOP will recap it.

That Explains the Dependence on Casinos

Kathy Reynolds a member of the Cherokee Nation after winning an anti-discrimination case in tribal court stated to the press, "Since the tribe has become so Westernized and adopted Christian religions and European ways, they strayed away from traditional Cherokee values of indifference."[Towleroad]

I hope that was an unfortunate slip and she meant tolerance.

What Bright Eyes Song Am I

You are "When the Curious Girl Realizes She is
Under Glass". You like thoughts of being
with loved ones and being devoted. You tend to
be selfish, but in an artistic way, or at least
you claim it is for art. Oh yeah, and pills are
very good friends of yours. (or they should
be.)

That analysis, I'm afraid, is creepily accurate.

Which BRIGHT EYES song are you?
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Intentionally Missed Connections

Yeah, I may have started dance lessons because was interested in dancing, but one of the reasons I stay is I like to watch you move. Especially once you start to get into those dances categorized as American rhythm. Yeah, you're kinda full of yourself, and you like to show off, but hey, I don't really have a problem with that. From what I hear, your day job is as a programmer. Kinda boring, but then again, I've always had a thing for logical men. A shame you're so serious about the dancing. You could definitely make the long Cleveland winter a lot more fun. [craigslist]

I'm not sure why you believe this creepy/insulting post will help you get this guy. First, you call him arrogant and attention seeking. Then you call him boring. Finally, you complain that he is dedicated. Additionally you write awkwardly. Why say "dances categorized as American rhythm", as opposed to American rhythm dances. If you are as bitchy as you sound and move as clumsily as you write, I have a feeling I know why he is ignoring you.

Happy New Year!